The Lepers of Society

It’s summer, 2011. I’m 22, a newlywed of 5 months and in Guatemala with my husband to serve the coolest missionary I’ve ever known, the late Lori Nij.

It was my second summer interning for her, at her school in Guatemala.

I could go on and on about all the adventures we had and everything we learned & experienced… but I want to focus on one profound situation. It’s stuck with me all these years and helped shape my expectations of ministry.

That summer I met a 12-year-old girl. I won’t use her real name so we’ll call her Sofía.

Sofía was a student at Lori's school and she was raised in a brothel by a well-known madam. A madam is a woman who manages a brothel. 

Samuel and Tiffany in Guatemala circa 2011.

We didn’t know who or where Sofía's real mother was and our understanding was neither did Sofía… Which is why she referred to the madam as her mother and all the prostitutes as her cousins, aunts or uncles. 

This brothel was next door to Lori’s house and they also operated a bar / brothel in town. 

Lori and her family were doing everything they could to support Sofía. To try and protect her from the inevitable life she faced.

But it was an uphill battle. 

Sofía was groomed her whole life for the future they wanted for her and it was all she knew. Lori pleaded Sofía’s case to the madam, asking that she allow the child to go to school, graduate and find a better future. 

Sofía was allowed to go to school, but there was no guarantee for how long and every week was a battle with the madam. 

Sofía’s virginity was being auctioned off to the town. When she turned 13, whoever the highest bidder was, could have her. Time was of the essence.

Why Do The Christians Love Them?

The only other person who seemed to care was a male prostitute who worked in the brothel and Sofía knew as her Uncle. 

He watched Sofía grow up. He observed Lori’s family, her school and life. The way she treated the brothel “family” was different. She loved them. 

This was different from the way everyone else treated them. 

They were outcasts, untouchables, sinners… the lepers of society.

To associate with them is to bring shame to your family. 

Why did the Christians love them? The church didn't want anything to do with them.

This was my beautiful lesson #1 that summer in ministry. Experiencing the living gospel. And I couldn’t get enough of it.

For most of my life, I hungered as a church going Christian for real ministry. I craved God culture, not mainstream American church culture. Much of it seemed watered down. 

Not just going to church but being the church. Fulfilling the great commision. Loving the unlovable. Bringing hope to the broken, most forgotten people in society.  

Why? Because I am a sinner. 

I experienced God’s grace and lived the miracle of walking with Him through some very trying times throughout my childhood and life.

Walking with Him through hard times makes all the difference.

And I wanted that for other people. Specifically, children who are growing up in hostile environments.

Tutoring in a Brothel

That summer, I taught English at the school and Lori gave Samuel (my husband) and I permission to do anything we could to encourage Sofía. 

She was very smart, but due to understandable distractions… struggling in school.

So I became her after-school-tutor.

This meant spending every afternoon from about 2-5pm in the brothel house tutoring her while simultaneously observing and infiltrating. 😉 

I made friends with the madam and all the women living there. To the point that the madam will stop me in the street to this day for hugs and hello’s. 

I won’t lie. I’m human. The madam disgusts me. Knowing what she’s done and is doing to all these girls… 

Lesson #2 that summer: When doing this work you have to put your emotions aside.

Focus on your goal: Helping the victims. If being friends with the enemy gives you a leg in, you do it. 

Also… who knows what this woman has been through. 

Hurt people, hurt people. 

My job in this situation is to ask God to fill me with His love and pray that He’ll convict her someday. 

I spent most of my time tutoring Sofía in the dining room of the brothel home. I observed all the men that were coming and going — police men, political figures, regular guys and so on…

Sofía had to take several breaks while studying to clean and cook for everyone in the house. It was clear to me that she was more like a maid to them than a family member.

She had to earn her keep... since she couldn’t yet contribute as a prostitute.

There were other children living in the brothel home. Among them was an 11-month old baby, fathered by a local leader of police.
 

The Birthday Party

Sofía invited us to attend the baby’s 1-year birthday party.

It was held at the bar / brothel in town and I’ll never forget the looks we got from people in town when we entered the bar for that birthday party. 

Eyes were wide as “the missionaries” entered the forbidden zone.

For some reason… I thought it was funny. #YoungRebel 

The bar looked and felt dark. There was a general room where the party was held. There were a bunch of bar stools on a dirt floor to sit. And there was a table of gifts decorated with balloons and a cake. 

In the back and to the side we could see several rooms with simple, thin curtains serving as doors. We knew what was behind them…

We placed our gift, a small porcelain tea cup on the gift table. It was supposed to represent how precious the baby girl is. 

We were there for a few hours and unintentionally the center of attention. 

Everyone was so happy that we were there. The fact that we found them important enough to spend time with, was more impactful than I was expecting… and humbling.

They asked us so many questions. Questions about where we’re from, when we married, why we didn’t have kids yet... 

At 22 I was already considered an old maid in Guatemalan culture. 😂

They also asked us who we believe God is, what we were doing there, what we did for work and so much more. 

While visiting, I couldn’t help but notice that Sofía was serving and cleaning up after everyone, again. She was the primary hostess. 

Nadia Me Quire (Nobody Loves Me)

The summer continued and some American short-term mission groups came and went. Some bringing VBS to the school, others were medical groups holding clinics.

It’s always such a joy for the children when groups visit.

I remember one of the groups, treated all the students for lice. I joined them in helping with the girls. We washed, combed, de-loused and braided the beautiful long dark hair of each girl.

When it was Sofia’s turn, she wanted me to do it. Her hair was so dirty and laden with lice.

It became an even bigger reality to me that this little girl had nobody to take care of her. No parents to keep her home, room and bedsheets clean. No mom to lovingly wash, comb and fix her hair. 

On the last evening of one of the medical group’s visits, Sofía was hanging out with us for dinner. After dinner, someone came and told me that she had locked herself in a bunk room and was hysterical.

I went over to the room and knocked on the door. 

Sofía peaked and let me in. She was crying so hard she was trembling. She told me that she didn’t belong anywhere and nobody loved her. 

She was completely broken. My heart ached for her. I knew exactly what she was talking about. 

She had been going to school and hanging out with “normal people” just long enough to not fit in at home. 

But she was raised and groomed by the brothel to the point that she didn’t quite fit in with her school friends or “normal people” either. 

All summer we watched her clash with both worlds — struggling to find identity and belonging.

I did the only thing I could. Hold and comfort her while she cry. And pour as much truth into her as possible. 

Truth about her value, how loved and precious she is to God. That God gave man free will and many choose to do evil but that He can even turn horrible things into beautiful things if we let Him... 

That her identity doesn’t have to be based on anything in this world, which is fleeting.

That it can be founded on something completely unshakeable and unchangeable… that she could be adopted into a family that would NEVER forsake her. God’s family. 

"God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great delight.” Ephesians 1:5

I told her this wouldn’t magically make her life easy but that she’d now have a savior to love and hold her hand through it. That He would work miracles through her life, giving her peace and joy.

We sat there hanging out and talking until she was ready to go back out. After about an hour, we rejoined the group for dinner.

Lesson #3 in ministry that summer. YOU cannot save anyone. Only God can. YOU also can't make anyone say yes to God. 

I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that experiencing trauma through the lens of having Jesus in your heart, creates a path of recovery on the other side of that trauma that is not as confusing to navigate. Because He holds your hand through it and teaches your heart right from wrong.

He's there in the darkest hours and He's still there through the healing and recovery.

I also know that God works for the good of those who love Him and that through the power of the holy spirit, a saved person will never be alone no matter how terrible their situation may be. 

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

That’s why when doing ministry, it’s hard to watch hurting people choose to remain in their suffering.

It’s also hard to stop trying to control everything.

God is in control.

So in these situations, apart from sharing and showing the gospel, the only other thing we can do, is pray for the individual.

Pray that God will reveal Himself and knock at the door of their heart, if it be His will. And if He does, that the individual be ready and open to Him.

"Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me." Revelation 3:20

The summer was coming to an end.

Sofía was still in school. The madam “acted” like Sofia would have a say in her future, but we were doubtful. 

Even if she did. Where would she go? What else did she know?
 

Later That Year and 11 Years Later...

Later that year, we returned over winter break and spent Christmas and New Years with Lori and her family. We love them so much. 

We visited the brothel and spoke with the madam. She was ecstatic to see us. She told me that Sofia was in San Juan, a town about 45 minutes away “working” and that she was pregnant.

I tried to probe further but the madam was vague.

Over the past 11 years, I’ve thought about Sofia frequently. Wondering what she’s been through... Where she is... How she’s doing... If she’s even alive. 

Over those years, we watched the baby who’s 1-year birthday party we went to, grow up in a similar environment as Sofia did.

Molly, Director of our girls school, moved to Guatemala around the time that this baby was 7 and started building a relationship with her and her family.

Sofia Reaches Out

Then one day last year, August 2021, Sofia reaches out to me on Facebook messenger.

For 11 years I haven’t seen or heard from her. Every year, I’d post Happy Birthday on her Facebook but it looked like it had been abandoned. 

So to say I was a little surprised when she reached out is an understatement.

She sent me a message asking if I remember her. 🤯

Oh honey, do I remember you.

She was excited to see that I was a mom and she told me she lives near San Raimundo and has three children.

She would be close to the age now that I was when I first met her. 

We sent some fun voice messages back and forth. Her sweet children recorded their little voices introducing themselves.

I told her that Samuel, Elijah (our 15-month old) and I would be in Guatemala for most of October and that we’d love to visit. 

She’s seemed excited about it and invited us to have dinner at her house.

When we went to Guatemala that October, I reached out to her but never heard back. I tried several times but to no avail.

I will continue to pray for her and reach out in hopes one day we can meet again.

Sofia Represents Why We Chose a Christian Girls School as Our Method for Ministry in Guatemala

It's why we choose to put quality over quantity. So we can focus on making this a holistic, safe place for girls in dire situations to grow & thrive surrounded by a community of people who love them.

It’s why we make sure that evangelism and learning about their savior is a priority in the curriculum.

And it's why we are building connections in the anti-human trafficking world so that we can better meet our community's needs through awareness, education and more.

If you want to help us help girls like Sofia, click here to learn more about our school in Guatemala.

Love and Blessings,

Tiffany Houck
CV Executive Director